I've tried many things over the last few years to get the kids to clean up. And through the trials I've learned a few tricks......
Number One:: Do not under any circumstance tell the kids you are "cleaning up". Some how they are programmed to rebel against those very words. It's no fun! So we use a few other words and techniques that still get the job done but introduce a little fun in the meantime!
The first is a Counting Game:: I give the kids a number of toys to pick up and PUT AWAY (my kids have a tendency to get the toys off the floor and pile them on a bed or dresser). It works great for a quick room rescue when the room is not totally out of control, just a little messy.
The Toy Scavenger:: is for total chaos. When every bin has exploded (er been played with) and there is no floor space left, we have a little treasure hunt! I give the kids toy "groups" to hunt for. Like legos, dolls, cars, ponies, army men, etc. I think it helps little minds focus on one thing and not feel so overwhelmed about cleaning up ALL the things on the floor!
The Race:: I set the timer and we "put toys in their homes" for 15 minutes. When the timer goes off we are rewarded with a nicer room AND usually a treat. If you do this before snack time or meal time it works well. You can be preparing the snack or meal while they work. And the faster they do it the better but again, with my kids I have to make sure things are actually being put away and not piled up!
And last but not least......my favorite......
Mission Impossible:: I LOVE this one. I use it for the living room, an area in our house that gets messy quick with it being the living room, dinning room and school room all in one! Each child has their own name....We've got 001, 002, 003 (I know creative right??) in their birth order. Kids love whispering and secrets so much I incorporated that into this method. I'll look into the living room and find something that each child can do, or identify something of that child's and then give them a mission. I bend down and whisper into their ears, "Ellie, I want you to pick up all the princess shoes and take them upstairs and put them in the shoe bin." And she's off! I have NEVER had a complaint about cleaning when I do this! Each child gets a little competitive with it, wanting to hear the other person's mission or know how many missions each on has done! It's too cute! Even Gracia gets missions (she's 003)! And in no time the whole room is cleaned up and lookin good! I usually do this when I am cooking dinner in the kitchen so I can see what they are doing and what needs to be done, and can get something done myself! And if an spy get's of track I can call out, "002~Is your mission completed???" They really love it. It helps teach them obedience, following directions and being responsible all at the same time!
What do you do to get your kids to clean up with out prodding and yelling???
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Feminism can take a Flying leap!
SO I've been doing a lot of blog hopping and book reading lately on the subject of The role of a wife and mother. And let me say for beginners I am quite shocked at what I've found. There is a growing group of meek yet not so timid women who are actually joyfully raising their little girls to be homemakers, to stay at home and serve their husbands and children. Now the question is are you offended or intrigued?
To tell you the truth I was at first, a little offended. Not because I see anything wrong with being a homemaker (I should hope not since my mother an I are both homemakers!), but to intentionally and specifically train your daughter to be a homemaker? I had never heard of such a thing! Many thoughts ran through my mind, what about your talents and gifts? What about security of having a career and job in the event you lose your husband? What about your education? What about your contribution to the finances? What about..........what God wanted for your life? This was my first clue I had been brainwashed by feminism.
From the time I was a little girl, everyone asks what you want to be when you grow up. What do you want to do, where you want to work. To be honest my first thought was never to be a Wife and Mother. I can give you a long list of careers I dreamed of having as a young girl, none of them included the two most important roles a woman be. The two roles that we were created, gifted and blessed to be. I never realized that this was the ugly face of feminism, telling me in secret that being a wife and mother weren't roles to aspire to.
You see feminism is clothed in bright, beautiful garments, whispering in your ear and telling you that you are so much more than just a homemaker. That you were made to do and be all that a man can and is. That if you don't enter the work force, get educated, {conform} you aren't worth as much as those who do. It has told generations of women that choosing to stay at home wasn't acceptable or valuable. That you were worthless. Worth less than those who pounded the pavement and held their degrees, attaining and surpassing men in rank and wage. I know because my own Mother suffered from this prejudice. Her idea of her own worth and the importance of her career were damaged because of this.
Feminist Simone de Beauvoir states, "No woman should be authorized to stay at home and raise her children. Society should be totally different. Women should not have that choice, precisely because if there is such a choice, too many women will make it."
Vivan Gornick states, "Being a housewife is an illegitimate profession...The choice to serve and be protected and plan towards being a family-maker is a choice that shouldn't be. The heart of radical feminism is to change that."
And unfortunately for many, it has done just that. Wages for men have gone down making it nearly impossible for the average husband to support his wife and family forcing scores of women into the work force. Woman have been lied to and convinced that taking care of those most important to her isn't a job, isn't important, isn't valuable. I have even made the mistake of saying, "I don't have a job!" I've been a wife of 11 years and a mother for almost 6 and it's only now that I am beginning to embrace and understand my role. And the more I learn and study, the more I can identify the areas where feminism and a world view of service has damaged my attitude as well as my identity as a housewife. What I should be and will be focusing on from now on, is my Biblical view of a wife and a mother. Because according to the Word of God, without me, man is incomplete.
Reading the creation account in Genesis 1 we find a few things. God was pleased with His creation, many times He called it "good". One time though, he looked on all that had been formed and declared something "not good". You know what it was? Loneliness and need. Adam was in need of a companion. He wasn't just bored being by himself, didn't just want someone to talk to, he needed someone, his existence was incomplete. Nothing could complete him other than someone who could help him, be with him, someone compatible. Not of dust, like man was formed, but from his side, God formed his helper, his mate, his companion. And when woman was made and God's creation was complete what was it that God said? It was good? No, He said it was Very Good. We are a special part of God's creation that He sees as very good. Our role as wife not only compliments our husbands, it completes the picture of what God says is very good. Adam alone, without a helper, was incomplete. We weren't an after thought or an "Oh yeah!" We were the final touch, the icing, the perfect compliment, that "special" creation that was needed, for God's creation to be deemed very good.
Let's take a quick look at the "illegitimate profession" of Keeper of the House. According to Proverbs 31 an excellent wife is one that is hard to come by. Why is that? If anyone can do it and do it well, aren't we a dime a dozen? Isn't it a talentless, menial job? No, she is trustworthy and loyal to her husband, she is thrifty and industrious and adds to his wealth, she is talented in many areas, she is a seamstress (a creator of beautiful things) she is a talented chef, providing healthy and delicious foods some of which she may have grown, she is resourceful and has an entrepreneurial spirit and mind, she is strong and willing to work hard, she is up early and to bed late making sure her house and those in it are cared for~it is her priority, she is generous and cares for the poor and needy, she speaks and does good to her husband, her service to him and their children allow him to fulfill his God-given duties and roles as she fulfills hers, she contributes to her husbands success, she has strength and dignity, she fears the Lord, she is wise and plans for the future, she is a teacher of wisdom, tempered with Mercy and kindness, she is skilled at managing the home and all that goes along with it, she uses her time wisely. And because of this, her children will bless her and praise her. Her husband will have a good reputation.
The saying, "Behind every good man, is a good woman." Is true! If it weren't for the dedication and hard work of a willing wife, the husband cannot be successful in all that God has called him to be. In my season of life I am seeing this first hand as Dave has been called to the Ministry. God has been opening up more and more doors for him to share His word and teach! God is transforming Dave's love for teaching science, and using it for His glory. If I am not capable of caring for the kids and the home, for making meals and training our children, he cannot fulfill his calling.
I hear you, you are chanting along with the feminists, "What about your calling? Your talents?" I use them everyday! I majored in education, homeschooling our children I use that talent and passion every day. I majored in Art, I am free to create and "do art" all the time, though it may look different than Painting 101, I create! Having 4 children has allowed me to study and research pregnancy and birth which I am passionate about! I have a love for learning that keeps me quite busy all week long! Scores of other women are using their talents in running their homes everyday! It's no small task to run a small business such as a family. It takes intention, organization, shrewd business skills in many areas. It takes hard work and determination, kindness and love, patience and mercy. It takes brains to be an excellent wife.
Many people have asked if I will return to teaching (in a school) once the kids are all in school. I always answer, "I don't know! Maybe!" For many reasons. More recently I have actually started to enjoy my role as a wife and mother, which for a long time I didn't think was possible. I thought it was normal to struggle with this stage of my life and basically not enjoy it. I don't give a clear answer because I don't know the future and life has been so full of God's desires and plans rather than my own, that I have a hard time focusing on the future in that sense. I think "maybe" because I like my peers, I like working for and with my best friend, he's a lot more forgiving and friendly than those I've found in the world. I can't be fired from this job;)
My heart has been opened to fulfilling my role as wife and mother in a way that is pleasing to God. I desire to serve my family in a new light, one that previously hadn't shined in a way that it does now. I supposes I didn't realize just how special my role was. Through my role I am serving not only my family but my God.
Matthew 25:37-40
37“Then these righteous ones will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing? 39 When did we ever see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ 40 “And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters,[f] you were doing it to me!’
To tell you the truth I was at first, a little offended. Not because I see anything wrong with being a homemaker (I should hope not since my mother an I are both homemakers!), but to intentionally and specifically train your daughter to be a homemaker? I had never heard of such a thing! Many thoughts ran through my mind, what about your talents and gifts? What about security of having a career and job in the event you lose your husband? What about your education? What about your contribution to the finances? What about..........what God wanted for your life? This was my first clue I had been brainwashed by feminism.
From the time I was a little girl, everyone asks what you want to be when you grow up. What do you want to do, where you want to work. To be honest my first thought was never to be a Wife and Mother. I can give you a long list of careers I dreamed of having as a young girl, none of them included the two most important roles a woman be. The two roles that we were created, gifted and blessed to be. I never realized that this was the ugly face of feminism, telling me in secret that being a wife and mother weren't roles to aspire to.
You see feminism is clothed in bright, beautiful garments, whispering in your ear and telling you that you are so much more than just a homemaker. That you were made to do and be all that a man can and is. That if you don't enter the work force, get educated, {conform} you aren't worth as much as those who do. It has told generations of women that choosing to stay at home wasn't acceptable or valuable. That you were worthless. Worth less than those who pounded the pavement and held their degrees, attaining and surpassing men in rank and wage. I know because my own Mother suffered from this prejudice. Her idea of her own worth and the importance of her career were damaged because of this.
Feminist Simone de Beauvoir states, "No woman should be authorized to stay at home and raise her children. Society should be totally different. Women should not have that choice, precisely because if there is such a choice, too many women will make it."
Vivan Gornick states, "Being a housewife is an illegitimate profession...The choice to serve and be protected and plan towards being a family-maker is a choice that shouldn't be. The heart of radical feminism is to change that."
And unfortunately for many, it has done just that. Wages for men have gone down making it nearly impossible for the average husband to support his wife and family forcing scores of women into the work force. Woman have been lied to and convinced that taking care of those most important to her isn't a job, isn't important, isn't valuable. I have even made the mistake of saying, "I don't have a job!" I've been a wife of 11 years and a mother for almost 6 and it's only now that I am beginning to embrace and understand my role. And the more I learn and study, the more I can identify the areas where feminism and a world view of service has damaged my attitude as well as my identity as a housewife. What I should be and will be focusing on from now on, is my Biblical view of a wife and a mother. Because according to the Word of God, without me, man is incomplete.
Reading the creation account in Genesis 1 we find a few things. God was pleased with His creation, many times He called it "good". One time though, he looked on all that had been formed and declared something "not good". You know what it was? Loneliness and need. Adam was in need of a companion. He wasn't just bored being by himself, didn't just want someone to talk to, he needed someone, his existence was incomplete. Nothing could complete him other than someone who could help him, be with him, someone compatible. Not of dust, like man was formed, but from his side, God formed his helper, his mate, his companion. And when woman was made and God's creation was complete what was it that God said? It was good? No, He said it was Very Good. We are a special part of God's creation that He sees as very good. Our role as wife not only compliments our husbands, it completes the picture of what God says is very good. Adam alone, without a helper, was incomplete. We weren't an after thought or an "Oh yeah!" We were the final touch, the icing, the perfect compliment, that "special" creation that was needed, for God's creation to be deemed very good.
Let's take a quick look at the "illegitimate profession" of Keeper of the House. According to Proverbs 31 an excellent wife is one that is hard to come by. Why is that? If anyone can do it and do it well, aren't we a dime a dozen? Isn't it a talentless, menial job? No, she is trustworthy and loyal to her husband, she is thrifty and industrious and adds to his wealth, she is talented in many areas, she is a seamstress (a creator of beautiful things) she is a talented chef, providing healthy and delicious foods some of which she may have grown, she is resourceful and has an entrepreneurial spirit and mind, she is strong and willing to work hard, she is up early and to bed late making sure her house and those in it are cared for~it is her priority, she is generous and cares for the poor and needy, she speaks and does good to her husband, her service to him and their children allow him to fulfill his God-given duties and roles as she fulfills hers, she contributes to her husbands success, she has strength and dignity, she fears the Lord, she is wise and plans for the future, she is a teacher of wisdom, tempered with Mercy and kindness, she is skilled at managing the home and all that goes along with it, she uses her time wisely. And because of this, her children will bless her and praise her. Her husband will have a good reputation.
The saying, "Behind every good man, is a good woman." Is true! If it weren't for the dedication and hard work of a willing wife, the husband cannot be successful in all that God has called him to be. In my season of life I am seeing this first hand as Dave has been called to the Ministry. God has been opening up more and more doors for him to share His word and teach! God is transforming Dave's love for teaching science, and using it for His glory. If I am not capable of caring for the kids and the home, for making meals and training our children, he cannot fulfill his calling.
I hear you, you are chanting along with the feminists, "What about your calling? Your talents?" I use them everyday! I majored in education, homeschooling our children I use that talent and passion every day. I majored in Art, I am free to create and "do art" all the time, though it may look different than Painting 101, I create! Having 4 children has allowed me to study and research pregnancy and birth which I am passionate about! I have a love for learning that keeps me quite busy all week long! Scores of other women are using their talents in running their homes everyday! It's no small task to run a small business such as a family. It takes intention, organization, shrewd business skills in many areas. It takes hard work and determination, kindness and love, patience and mercy. It takes brains to be an excellent wife.
Many people have asked if I will return to teaching (in a school) once the kids are all in school. I always answer, "I don't know! Maybe!" For many reasons. More recently I have actually started to enjoy my role as a wife and mother, which for a long time I didn't think was possible. I thought it was normal to struggle with this stage of my life and basically not enjoy it. I don't give a clear answer because I don't know the future and life has been so full of God's desires and plans rather than my own, that I have a hard time focusing on the future in that sense. I think "maybe" because I like my peers, I like working for and with my best friend, he's a lot more forgiving and friendly than those I've found in the world. I can't be fired from this job;)
My heart has been opened to fulfilling my role as wife and mother in a way that is pleasing to God. I desire to serve my family in a new light, one that previously hadn't shined in a way that it does now. I supposes I didn't realize just how special my role was. Through my role I am serving not only my family but my God.
Matthew 25:37-40
37
Friday, June 18, 2010
Hitting the wall {head on}
Hitting the wall ::
In endurance sports, particularly cycling and running, hitting the wall or the bonk describes a condition caused by the depletion of glycogen stores in the liver and muscles, which manifests itself by precipitous fatigue and loss of energy.
I would liken my job as a mother to that of an athlete in an endurance sport. We do and run without stopping, sometimes grappling for the occasional handout of water or food. There is no baton to pass, this is a race we are to do ourselves. We are the maid, the cook, the teacher/trainer, launderer, chauffeur. We are expected and needed to have endless, boundless energy and to run this great race with smiling faces and right attitudes. This week I have definitely hit the wall.
I am depleted, I am fatigued, I have no energy and possibly on the verge of being depressed.
Put in perspective I do this to myself quite often. I have this super woman complex....in that I think I am superwoman. Which I am not. I cannot do all things nor make all people happy. Unfortunately I talk myself {quite often} into thinking I can and will. But I can't and don't.
Right now, from my perspective life looks more than overwhelming. Summer is filled to the brim with activities and functions both fun and stressful. And even though we've cut back on some activities, it is still full, leaving us little time for relaxation or family time. This is never what I want for summer vacation, and always what seems to happen!
We are also anticipating a move in August/September which has started to plague my brain. It's something we've prayed about for years, being closer to the church and being able to better serve where we feel called. But when I look around my small crowded house, even though I look forward to having more room, I am overwhelmed at what it is going to take to actually move! It's like one giant puzzle that isn't fitting in my mind. I suppose it's because change isn't always exciting to me as it should be. Of course there are tons of positives (like the house is bigger, closer to church,cheaper), but actually getting there is uncharted territory. I think about the days I will have to be moving and shuffling with Dave at work and me trying to both homeschool and move/rearrange life, and watch all 4 kids with tears because I don't know how I am going to do it all.
And most of those are insignificant, {like where will I fold my clothes with no folding counter? or where will we put all our shoes???} silly I know. But they are things I think about when I walk around here looking at all the stuff we have! There are other questions that are more significant, like where will we fit everyone, the shapes and sizes of rooms are different and mathematically things don't fit quite like they do here. We can fit beds, dressers and toys if some are upstairs and some are downstairs, but who goes where? What makes the most sense? I don't know.
Mostly we've become accustomed to life here. I will miss living near the ocean, in our first home, where all my littles have been born so far. And even though we don't fit in this house and really can't afford to live here at this point, it's been home for so long, it's hard to imagine us anywhere else, even if that somewhere else is a step up.
So I lack the energy to do little else but make it from sun-up to sun-down. And I suppose that is okay for now. The laundry is piling up, the house is unraveling more and more each day, and Sunday we'll be heading to Awana camp which means tomorrow I have to pack up 5 people to survive a week away from home. Maybe the time away will help clear my head a little.
In endurance sports, particularly cycling and running, hitting the wall or the bonk describes a condition caused by the depletion of glycogen stores in the liver and muscles, which manifests itself by precipitous fatigue and loss of energy.
I would liken my job as a mother to that of an athlete in an endurance sport. We do and run without stopping, sometimes grappling for the occasional handout of water or food. There is no baton to pass, this is a race we are to do ourselves. We are the maid, the cook, the teacher/trainer, launderer, chauffeur. We are expected and needed to have endless, boundless energy and to run this great race with smiling faces and right attitudes. This week I have definitely hit the wall.
I am depleted, I am fatigued, I have no energy and possibly on the verge of being depressed.
Put in perspective I do this to myself quite often. I have this super woman complex....in that I think I am superwoman. Which I am not. I cannot do all things nor make all people happy. Unfortunately I talk myself {quite often} into thinking I can and will. But I can't and don't.
Right now, from my perspective life looks more than overwhelming. Summer is filled to the brim with activities and functions both fun and stressful. And even though we've cut back on some activities, it is still full, leaving us little time for relaxation or family time. This is never what I want for summer vacation, and always what seems to happen!
We are also anticipating a move in August/September which has started to plague my brain. It's something we've prayed about for years, being closer to the church and being able to better serve where we feel called. But when I look around my small crowded house, even though I look forward to having more room, I am overwhelmed at what it is going to take to actually move! It's like one giant puzzle that isn't fitting in my mind. I suppose it's because change isn't always exciting to me as it should be. Of course there are tons of positives (like the house is bigger, closer to church,cheaper), but actually getting there is uncharted territory. I think about the days I will have to be moving and shuffling with Dave at work and me trying to both homeschool and move/rearrange life, and watch all 4 kids with tears because I don't know how I am going to do it all.
And most of those are insignificant, {like where will I fold my clothes with no folding counter? or where will we put all our shoes???} silly I know. But they are things I think about when I walk around here looking at all the stuff we have! There are other questions that are more significant, like where will we fit everyone, the shapes and sizes of rooms are different and mathematically things don't fit quite like they do here. We can fit beds, dressers and toys if some are upstairs and some are downstairs, but who goes where? What makes the most sense? I don't know.
Mostly we've become accustomed to life here. I will miss living near the ocean, in our first home, where all my littles have been born so far. And even though we don't fit in this house and really can't afford to live here at this point, it's been home for so long, it's hard to imagine us anywhere else, even if that somewhere else is a step up.
So I lack the energy to do little else but make it from sun-up to sun-down. And I suppose that is okay for now. The laundry is piling up, the house is unraveling more and more each day, and Sunday we'll be heading to Awana camp which means tomorrow I have to pack up 5 people to survive a week away from home. Maybe the time away will help clear my head a little.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
A {little} peek
I love this phase. She's only a few days old here, sleepy and chubby and good smelling.
We are doing good. All of us.
I really thought having 4 kids would be overwhelming, and believe me there have been times! But all in all it's been wonderful. Dave and I have always tried to foster independence in our children (age appropriate of course) and we are seeing that more and more. The milestones are other 3 children are coming to as we've added a newbie is amazing, and sad all at the same time!
With summer in full blast it's already been full of late nights, movies and slumber parties. The next few days we'll be setting up the above ground pool! We'll all be nice and tan!
We'll also be continuing school for the summer. Two months seems like a long time for little minds to retain all that they've learned this year! And in all honestly my kids go a little crazy with nothing planned. The house ends up a wreck, they jump from activity to activity chaotically. It's not good. So we'll continue with reading, math, Bible and ART and science. But only a little each day, no more than an hour a day, and mostly FUN stuff! But I do want them to keep up with what they've learned!
We've also got VBS this summer in July, Awana camp in late June, Dave teaching summer school.....so we will be busy! But busy is fun. I am really hoping to get a little sewing at some point, maybe some knitting. But my main goal is just to enjoy the summer. To take it easy, not have too many expectations, and just enjoy my little family!
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Introducing Liora Tresa
Liora (Lee-{OR}-ah) Means the gift of God's light in Hebrew, Tresa is my grandmother's middle name (Italian spelling)
She is a gift of light to us.......here a few photos of the new babe. Unedited, because we had to wipe out the computer and my photoshop isn't up and running yet....but I'll edit them later and add to them.....here she is as photographed by a friend.....
She is such a sweet and easy baby....so sleepy I have to wake her up to eat all the time!
Today we had our first day without Daddy home (though Aunt Steph is here so I am not alone!!!) We actually had a very normal day! School work got done, naps were taken, I even had a small amount of time to myself!
It's still hard to believe there are four little Heldts running around here (okay 3 running and one sleeping). I know the crazy times are ahead when Liora has more wake time and needs more entertainment, but I am enjoying the peace now.
We also had our first day of cloth diapers which I just love....newborn cloth diapers are so little and cute!
She is a gift of light to us.......here a few photos of the new babe. Unedited, because we had to wipe out the computer and my photoshop isn't up and running yet....but I'll edit them later and add to them.....here she is as photographed by a friend.....
She is such a sweet and easy baby....so sleepy I have to wake her up to eat all the time!
Today we had our first day without Daddy home (though Aunt Steph is here so I am not alone!!!) We actually had a very normal day! School work got done, naps were taken, I even had a small amount of time to myself!
It's still hard to believe there are four little Heldts running around here (okay 3 running and one sleeping). I know the crazy times are ahead when Liora has more wake time and needs more entertainment, but I am enjoying the peace now.
We also had our first day of cloth diapers which I just love....newborn cloth diapers are so little and cute!
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Our {home} Birth experience
I know for many people home birth may seem a little weird, rare, dangerous....maybe even stupid!!! But for us it was nothing short of amazing.
We chose a homebirth for many reasons. When we got pregnant with Jonah, Dave and I decided we wanted to go as natural as possible with all aspects of the pregnancy and birth, we wanted no interventions, we educated our selves. We still gave birth in a hospital, had my water broken and an epidural. Yeah that didn't go as planned.
With Ellie we got a natural birth, she had a slight shoulder dystocia, still weren't totally thrilled with the delivery but happier than with Jonah.
Gracia was the same, slight shoulder dystocia, we were less than thrilled with the hospital. I won't go into too many details but, we didn't know the doctors who delivered Gracia, didn't like their orders or bedside manner and just were not pleased with the experience.
With this baby we wanted something different.
I have heard some many wonderful things and read so many wonderful experiences with midwives and homebirths it had been something I had want to try but never really had the nerve or comfort level to do. Then when Gracia's labor only lasted 2 hours and we barely made it to the hospital, we re-thought the homebirth idea. The idea of us delivering a baby on the side of the road was a real fear of mine. The idea of having people come to us while we labored and prepared sounded heavenly and it turned out it was.
Here's our story::
Labor usually starts with the loss of a plug for me, so that was what I was waiting for. When I started having some contractions at church around 6:30pm, I truely didn't think it was "it". I just thought they were Braxton Hicks contractions and thought I had about a week until the baby would come.
About 7:30 I just didn't feel right. I had an urge to get home and get in my bath tub, though I still didn't think I was in labor. But Dave was awesome at listening to me and getting us in the car and home by 8pm. I got in the tub immediatly and could hear Dave downstairs getting stuff ready, even though I hadn't officially told him this was it. Around 9:20pm I gave the midwife a call. I told her I didn't want her to come out if it wasn't real labor, there still wasn't any plug, but contractions were coming closer together and getting more intense. She said she could hear it in my voice and that she was coming.
So from 8pm till 10pm I just hung out in our tub upstairs. During that time I was going through a wide range of emotions. A big part of me didn't believe I was in labor, another part of me didn't want to be in labor yet! I know it sound so weird, but we wanted Dave's sister to be here, we weren't quite ready with what we had wanted to get down from the attic, etc.....you know the list didn't have everything crossed off of it! So for a while I feel like I was mentally fighting my own labor. Dave would come in and check on me and I would share my fears or concerns with him and he is so wonderful. It's so nice to have someone that I can be totally honest with and just talk to and know that he won't think I am crazy. He's there with me and is present and knows exactly what to say to get me into the right frame of mind.
Around 10pm I went downstairs to get into the birthing tub, Dave had everything set up and ready. The tub wasn't full but the water was deep enough to still be relaxing. I started feeling the urge to push the baby down and after a few pushes my water broke, nice and clear fluid. The midwife arrived shortly after that and the real work began.
Poor Dave was running around bringing in bags and getting everything in order. Finally the doula (who had arrived right after I got in the tub) asked Dave to get in the tub with me. That helped so much. He was behind me, making it more comfortable and encouraging me.
It was almost like I was pushing and going through transition at the same time. I could feel the baby filling up the birth canal and I thought and verbalized that I was not going to be able to get the baby out! She felt huge, and I didn't feel like I was going to be able to push her anywhere! I felt like pushing was really not doing anything! Though I know it was, mentally it felt like nothing was happening. It was incredibly painful, more than the other births. But everone was so encouraging. Then all of a sudden her head was there, I reached down and could feel it there! That was really amazing. Everything slowed down and Miriam told me to just breath, and I breathed her head out gently without tearing. That was one thing I wanted so badly....all my other births seemed so chaotic and quick.
Then it happened, she was stuck....like the other 2 girls! I changed positions after a few intense tries of pushing without anything happening. This one though was stuck because she was trying to get out with both hands above her head! A few pushes in a new position wasn't working, so Miriam suggested getting out of the pool, well as soon as I stood up out she came! I remember saying something like "Here she comes someone catch her!" and the term "Babycatcher" came to life. Both Dave and Miriam caught her and she was born. She was handed to me and we stood there meeting for the first time face to face. I was so thankful it was all over! So thankful she was safe and breathing and that I had just given birth to a 10 pound little healthy chunky baby, in my own home, with my husband and midwife and doula....and everything incredible.
Honestly I was in a blissful shock for the next few hours. I really truly had a hard time grasping the fact that the baby was here! That we were okay, the midwife had made it in record time and just in time for the baby! Even though the delivery had been hard, pushing had been difficult and painful, I had done it! We had the experience and the location we wanted. The doula helped clean everything up and tucked me into bed with my new amazing little miracle. This soft, plushy chubby little thing that I couldn't stop staring at....and still can't. I wouldn't have changed a thing about the birth, though it was the hardest of all the babies (besides Jonah's 3 hour push-a-thon). The biggest of all my babies, but being here at home.....well there is nothing like it. Really. Nothing like it. Even Dave was thrilled and he had to do most of the work of setting up and cleaning up!
If we do this again.....cause really we don't feel like we are in total control of that, though we've tried unsuccessfully, we will have another homebirth as long as the conditions are right and we are healthy. It was the greatest gift, and the best thing to wake up to a new baby in my own bed and introduce the rest of the kids to their newest addition......there is more to tell at another day and time about our exerience.
We are still deciding on the perfect name....so a name and photos will be coming very soon!
We chose a homebirth for many reasons. When we got pregnant with Jonah, Dave and I decided we wanted to go as natural as possible with all aspects of the pregnancy and birth, we wanted no interventions, we educated our selves. We still gave birth in a hospital, had my water broken and an epidural. Yeah that didn't go as planned.
With Ellie we got a natural birth, she had a slight shoulder dystocia, still weren't totally thrilled with the delivery but happier than with Jonah.
Gracia was the same, slight shoulder dystocia, we were less than thrilled with the hospital. I won't go into too many details but, we didn't know the doctors who delivered Gracia, didn't like their orders or bedside manner and just were not pleased with the experience.
With this baby we wanted something different.
I have heard some many wonderful things and read so many wonderful experiences with midwives and homebirths it had been something I had want to try but never really had the nerve or comfort level to do. Then when Gracia's labor only lasted 2 hours and we barely made it to the hospital, we re-thought the homebirth idea. The idea of us delivering a baby on the side of the road was a real fear of mine. The idea of having people come to us while we labored and prepared sounded heavenly and it turned out it was.
Here's our story::
Labor usually starts with the loss of a plug for me, so that was what I was waiting for. When I started having some contractions at church around 6:30pm, I truely didn't think it was "it". I just thought they were Braxton Hicks contractions and thought I had about a week until the baby would come.
About 7:30 I just didn't feel right. I had an urge to get home and get in my bath tub, though I still didn't think I was in labor. But Dave was awesome at listening to me and getting us in the car and home by 8pm. I got in the tub immediatly and could hear Dave downstairs getting stuff ready, even though I hadn't officially told him this was it. Around 9:20pm I gave the midwife a call. I told her I didn't want her to come out if it wasn't real labor, there still wasn't any plug, but contractions were coming closer together and getting more intense. She said she could hear it in my voice and that she was coming.
So from 8pm till 10pm I just hung out in our tub upstairs. During that time I was going through a wide range of emotions. A big part of me didn't believe I was in labor, another part of me didn't want to be in labor yet! I know it sound so weird, but we wanted Dave's sister to be here, we weren't quite ready with what we had wanted to get down from the attic, etc.....you know the list didn't have everything crossed off of it! So for a while I feel like I was mentally fighting my own labor. Dave would come in and check on me and I would share my fears or concerns with him and he is so wonderful. It's so nice to have someone that I can be totally honest with and just talk to and know that he won't think I am crazy. He's there with me and is present and knows exactly what to say to get me into the right frame of mind.
Around 10pm I went downstairs to get into the birthing tub, Dave had everything set up and ready. The tub wasn't full but the water was deep enough to still be relaxing. I started feeling the urge to push the baby down and after a few pushes my water broke, nice and clear fluid. The midwife arrived shortly after that and the real work began.
Poor Dave was running around bringing in bags and getting everything in order. Finally the doula (who had arrived right after I got in the tub) asked Dave to get in the tub with me. That helped so much. He was behind me, making it more comfortable and encouraging me.
It was almost like I was pushing and going through transition at the same time. I could feel the baby filling up the birth canal and I thought and verbalized that I was not going to be able to get the baby out! She felt huge, and I didn't feel like I was going to be able to push her anywhere! I felt like pushing was really not doing anything! Though I know it was, mentally it felt like nothing was happening. It was incredibly painful, more than the other births. But everone was so encouraging. Then all of a sudden her head was there, I reached down and could feel it there! That was really amazing. Everything slowed down and Miriam told me to just breath, and I breathed her head out gently without tearing. That was one thing I wanted so badly....all my other births seemed so chaotic and quick.
Then it happened, she was stuck....like the other 2 girls! I changed positions after a few intense tries of pushing without anything happening. This one though was stuck because she was trying to get out with both hands above her head! A few pushes in a new position wasn't working, so Miriam suggested getting out of the pool, well as soon as I stood up out she came! I remember saying something like "Here she comes someone catch her!" and the term "Babycatcher" came to life. Both Dave and Miriam caught her and she was born. She was handed to me and we stood there meeting for the first time face to face. I was so thankful it was all over! So thankful she was safe and breathing and that I had just given birth to a 10 pound little healthy chunky baby, in my own home, with my husband and midwife and doula....and everything incredible.
Honestly I was in a blissful shock for the next few hours. I really truly had a hard time grasping the fact that the baby was here! That we were okay, the midwife had made it in record time and just in time for the baby! Even though the delivery had been hard, pushing had been difficult and painful, I had done it! We had the experience and the location we wanted. The doula helped clean everything up and tucked me into bed with my new amazing little miracle. This soft, plushy chubby little thing that I couldn't stop staring at....and still can't. I wouldn't have changed a thing about the birth, though it was the hardest of all the babies (besides Jonah's 3 hour push-a-thon). The biggest of all my babies, but being here at home.....well there is nothing like it. Really. Nothing like it. Even Dave was thrilled and he had to do most of the work of setting up and cleaning up!
If we do this again.....cause really we don't feel like we are in total control of that, though we've tried unsuccessfully, we will have another homebirth as long as the conditions are right and we are healthy. It was the greatest gift, and the best thing to wake up to a new baby in my own bed and introduce the rest of the kids to their newest addition......there is more to tell at another day and time about our exerience.
We are still deciding on the perfect name....so a name and photos will be coming very soon!
Thursday, March 25, 2010
What's to come
So our home PC just fizzled. Well....not the entire PC {seriously thanking the Lord} just a virus that attacked the use of the internet! So while all my files and photos are safe, I can't get on the net to post all the things I am falling behind on! I've got some give aways and some reviews all lined up and ready to go, but all my photos are on the other computer so doing a little catch up and switch-a-roo are in order to get everthing up and running! but here is a little taste of what is to come::
I'll be reviewing the the following products :
Here are some giveaways headed your way!!!
I'll be reviewing the the following products :
- The Farber and Castell young Artist Texture set. Incredible! The kids really loved it and I can't wait to share with you the fun they had!
- The Baby K-Tan sling, a hybrid sling I am waiting to arrive so I can try in out!
- The Story of Easter by Gwen Ellis. A fun condensed version of Holy week with easy to absorb facts and descriptions of the last week of Jesus' life on earth. I'll be including fun crafts you can do with your kids as you read the sections in this book. It also comes with a DVD!!!!
Here are some giveaways headed your way!!!
- An Apron giveaway from fewofmyfavoritethings Fabulous hand made creations including my favorite Mother/daughter matching aprons. Amazing creativity and craftsmaship!
- A giveaway from Picky Sticky These great little stickers are perfect for keeping tabs of your babies age OR your pregnancy! Just stick and click!
- My very own giveaway......a Keiki Kuddlerz Sling! In anticipation of getting to sling my own newborn again!!!
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